New!
Client Rush Book
June 17th, 2011 |

How To Deal With Blood-Sucking Leeches
Disguised As Wanna-Be Clients

Trevor

A Tribute Post For
People Fed Up With
Freebie Seekers

G’day

Tell me… be honest… was I too harsh with this guy?

Email correspondence pasted below.

 

Think big. Be different

Bret Thomson

 

——————————————

 

From: Trevor Mulldane
Sent: 26th May 2011 10:48am
To: Bret Thomson
Subject: Urgent copywriting project

 

Hi Bret

 

I saw you speak at a conference last year and I thought I’d give you a chance to write sales copy for my company.

We are launching an exciting piece of software for social media in two weeks time. We have two other copywriters submitting copy for this project. We will spilt-test your sales copy against the others to see which converts best. If your copy is successful, we will then let you write for our future projects. We are happy to pay you for future projects, however this project is just a test to see if you qualify.

Please submit some recent copy samples for me to review ASAP. Also, include your prices for writing a sales letter. Send your samples and prices to my assistant Sharon (Cc’d in this email) by C.O.B tomorrow, then she will send you the project brief.

We will need your first draft by next Friday June 3rd.

Trevor

 

—————————————–

From: Bret Thomson
Sent: 26th May 2011 11:21am
To: Trevor Mulldane
Subject: Re: Urgent copywriting project

 

Hi Trevor

Thanks for thinking of me, but I’m busy enough right now without writing copy for free.

Re prices: I don’t give out prices without my potential client filling out a detailed questionnaire and phone interview. This is the first step of my essential researching criteria.

I’m happy to send this to you anyway, as it will surely benefit you.

Good luck with your project.

Kind regards

Bret

www.BretThomson.com

 

—————————————

From: Trevor Mulldane
Sent: 26th May 2011 11:36am
To: Bret Thomson
Subject: Re: Re: Urgent copywriting project

 

Bret

I don’t have time for quizzes or games.

And frankly, your short sightedness surprises me. You could make a lot of money later on, once this product goes big.

I only contacted you because I saw you speak from stage and you sounded like you knew what you were talking about. Maybe I was wrong?

Send me your current copy examples anyway, and if I think your work is up to scratch, I may give you another chance.

Trevor

————————————–

From: Bret Thomson
Sent: 26th May 2011 11:57am
To: Trevor Mulldane
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Urgent copywriting project

 

Hi Trevor

I have to apologise. I didn’t realize we had met. I have to be honest… I’m a little confused. Are you sure it was me you saw speaking on stage?

Because I can’t remember wearing a t-shirt that read, “Feel-free-to-screw-me-over-and-I’ll-kiss-your-ass-for-free”.

Amazing coincidence though… because just this morning I sprung out of bed hoping someone would give me an “opportunity” to exchange my years of experience of writing million-dollar sales copy – for nothing!

Ohhh, sorry, my bad… you did say I may get paid later for a future job. Wow, thank you Mr. Scrooge (so generous).

Next week I had organized a special camping trip with my three sons for some long-overdue father-and-son time… Let me just text my boys and cancel the trip so I can work on your project for free. Oh joy…

Bret
www.BretThomson.com

P.S. If you ever need your house painted (for free)… or help moving heavy furniture, please make sure you ask me first. What an honor that would be.

—————————————

From: Trevor Mulldane
Sent: 26th May 2011 12:05pm
To: Bret Thomson
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Urgent copywriting project

 

I will over look your smart-ass attempt of being funny and give you one last chance to be a part of this.

You obviously have no idea how much money this software launch will make.

Send me recent copy examples and prices ASAP or we will move forward without you.

Trevor

 

—————————————

From: Bret Thomson
Sent: 26th May 2011 12:28pm
To: Trevor Mulldane
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Urgent copywriting project

 

 

Hi Trevor

I’m sorry. Thanks for giving me a second chance for you to suck the bone marrow from my copywriting soul.

As requested, here are my most recent copy examples:

 

 

“They All Laughed When I Sat Down To Write Copy For Trevor
Because He’s Too Tight To Pay…”

 

 

“Give Me Just 3 Hours Working With Trevor
And He’ll Happily Milk Me As Dry As A Camels
Arse In A Sandstorm – Guilt Free – Guaranteed”

 

 

“Who Else Wants To Sell Their Soul To A
Knob-Jockey That Blatantly Exploits Talented
People To Selfishly Line His Own Pockets?”

—————————————–

From: Trevor Mulldane
Sent: 26th May 2011 12:34pm
To: Bret Thomson
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Urgent copywriting project

 

Bret

You obviously don’t have the brains or maturity to comprehend the scope of what we are doing.

I only work with professionals, not idiots like yourself.

Trevor

 

——————————————-

From: Bret Thomson
Sent: 26th May 2011 12:39pm
To: Trevor Mulldane
Subject: jection

 

Hi Trevor

I am so mature.

You’re not – times a hundred!

No, wait… a MILLION!

 

—————————————

From: Trevor Mulldane
Sent: 26th May 2011 12:42pm
To: Bret Thomson
Subject: Re: jection

 

I’m not even going to give you the pleasure in responding.

 

—————————————

From: Bret Thomson
Sent: 26th May 2011 12:44pm
To: Trevor Mulldane
Subject: Re: Re: jection

 

But you just did.

 

————————————-

From: Trevor Mulldane
Sent: 26th May 2011 12:46pm
To: Bret Thomson
Subject: Re: Re: Re: jection

 

Fuck off.

 

————————————–

 

So again… was I too harsh?
Go ahead and leave a comment below – don’t be shy ;)

Think big. Be different…

Bret Thomson

 

 

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